I never thought I’d be spending Christmas night sitting on a chair in a hospital room. We were moved to the private room. It was nice that there were trees to look out on. Mum would be able to see them if she opened her eyes.
Ros and I sat on very hard chairs – I spent the rest of the night trying to doze – and in meditation.
As the new day dawned, we rallied ourselves with coffee. Mum was still with us – good – because Sue was flying in from Sydney that morning. Sue had gone down for her pre-arranged Christmas – thinking she had enough time to make it back – but we had told her to come back sooner rather than later. Emma also came to join us – and half sister Liz was with us too – by phone. Matt was at home to look after Doug – he had badly injured his back the day before while lifting Mum out of the car.
Emma brought some ‘ normal food’ for us (as opposed to hospital food), I picked up Sue from the airport – and we settled in for the day. It was Mum’s 90th birthday. We took turns in sitting near her and holding her hand. She was still distressed – moaning – sometimes the words didn’t make sense – other times she could talk to us.
I always read about people who have died peacefully, surrounded by family – well this wasn’t a peaceful death.
Emma – having sat many times with dying patients – was able to educate us on the ‘stages of dying’. But she had never seen patients quite so restless – and fighting all the way to the end.
We talked about different things – and I brought up the subject of her wedding ring – it was to go to Emma. At one point Mum listened to us debate whether we should leave her for a moment to make a cup of tea – she told us to go!
As the day wore on, Mum fell into a restless sleep – and now didn’t seem conscious of her surroundings. We still held her hand – she was so very hot. We also kept reassuring her that everyone was okay – she needn’t worry about her children – or grandchildren – we were all fine.
I sat in a meditative state – and started to pick up messages – she wanted us to sing to her – and the song she wanted was ‘Morningtown Ride’ – made famous by The Seekers in the 60’s. It’s a children’s lullaby.
We knew this song – not all the words but we started to sing.
I then had some visions – I could see her mother waiting – and her father…. Then I saw my own father – he came to take her hand. Then I saw another man – I can only say he looked like how Jesus is depicted. He took her hand – and the love pouring out of him was overwhelming.
It took some time – but finally she decided to go – we were still singing Morningtown Ride and I like to think she took the song with her as she crossed over….
Emma checked for a pulse – she was certainly gone. The fight had left her body – peace descended – and with that – relief….
Relief was my first emotion – for both her and myself. There were tears and hugs all around.
It was around 8 pm – she had died on her 90th birthday…..
We were exhausted…. we headed home to Doug and Matt – opened a bottle of champagne – and toasted both Mum’s birth….. and death….
COMING UP – A SPECIAL FUNERAL….
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