The horses…. my saving grace in so many ways – and especially at this time.  I would still try and watch some of the DVDs from Alexandra Kurland.  I couldn’t really concentrate though – but it was a wonderful escape.

At the time, I thought I was achieving nothing with the horses – but later I realised that all the very short sessions with Magnum had added up.  He was becoming much more trusting of me – the sessions were so short that it left him wanting more – and had I had more time – we may not have progressed as much as we did.

The horses were always there – so solid, so grounded.  I could stand out there and just be with them – and at the same time absorb the sounds of the birds and the forest.  At the time I hadn’t noticed that our relationship had changed.  I wasn’t the saviour – trying to repair traumatised horses.  Now they were the solid ones – it was like they sensed that I was just shattered – exhausted from not only dealing with Mum – but exhausted from the constant battle with the management of every health organisation she had been in.

They were my soft place to fall  – and my listeners.  I talked and talked to them – out loud – just in the way you would talk to friends.

One evening, after coming home from a very trying few days, where Mum had been crying, restless – and at times a little aggressive –  I stood with Ducati in the stable – in tears.  I told him I just didn’t know what to do – should I try and find a new home for her – would it upset her leaving people she had come to rely on?  How did I decide?

I told him I just didn’t know how long I could carry this burden of responsibility.   I asked him what should I do?  I felt better for just talking to him – and I had renewed energy to face the next day.

When I saw Mum the following day – one of the helpers was sitting with her – she was in her room – and still distressed – but excited.  The carer said she had a visitor in the night – ‘Yes’ said Mum – ‘Your horse was here!!’  I asked her which one.  She said ‘You know – the tall, thin one’.  ‘Do you mean Ducati?’  I asked.  ‘Yes!!’  Both Mum and the carer said.

The carer said she had become agitated – then excited – and was saying the horse was there.  I asked what Ducati was doing.  She said he appeared to her and said ‘Chin up luvvie – you’ll be okay’.  I told her I had been discussing her with Ducati.   Mum had watched my psychic happenings over the years –  and this just made her day.  And it helped pull her out of the mindset she had been in.  I just wanted to hug Ducati!!

ducati cool

But Mum was to face more health problems ……

COMING UP – THE KIDNAPPING!!

IF YOU ARE NEW TO THIS STORY, PLEASE START AT THE BEGINNING HERE – Part 1 – An Introduction

PLEASE SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE FOR PREVIOUS BLOG POSTS

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